Thor Becomes A Blushing Bride
Carl Larsson/Wikimedia CommonsLoki dresses Thor up as a bride.
Thor, son of Odin, was the mightiest of the gods. His hammer Mjollnir made him the strongest god in Asgard. That’s something you might already know – but you might not be aware that, according to one lesser-known Norse legend, he looked absolutely stunning in a dress.
The Norse gods (even after they’d cheated their way into getting a wall around Asgard) still didn’t have much of a plan to keep the giants from killing them. They probably just assumed Thor would take care of it with his big hammer.
It never occurred to any of the Norse gods to come up with a plan B. So when Thor’s hammer was stolen by a giant named Thrym, the Norse gods panicked.
Thor Takes One For The Team
Thrym wanted to marry Freyja, the Norse goddess of love, and he threatened to destroy all of the gods if they didn’t hand her over immediately. Thor donned a bridal gown and a veil pretending to be Freyja and went off to marry Thrym. Loki joined him as his blushing bridesmaid.
W.G. Collingwood/Wikimedia CommonsThrym kisses Thor on their wedding day.
Thrym was enraptured by how Thor’s figure filled out a dress. Even after watching Thor eat an entire ox in one sitting, he insisted on kissing him — a moment that puts even the kinkiest of Thor fan-fictions to shame.
To his credit, Thor was willing to go along with it for as long as he had to in order to protect the gods. He waited until Thrym pulled out Mjollnir to bless their wedding ceremony. Thor snatched the hammer away and gave the story that traditional Norse ending where he bashes everybody’s heads in.
